Unable To Stay, Unwilling To Leave
by White Lily of the Lane
Summary: One shot. Rose's thoughts as she is in the lifeboat Jack made her get in. What she is thinking of and why she jumped of to go to Jack.


I hope you all will like this 'Titanic' one-shot I've been working on. It's about Rose when she gets on the lifeboat after Jack makes her. What's going through her head and what not. How she feels and why she jumped back on the ship. This is my first Titanic story, so be gentle. I tried to put a lot of emphasis into it. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Jack, Rose, Cal and all other characters and of course the Titanic do not belong to me.

…………

I looked around. Everyone was frightened and scared. Crying women and their children had to say good bye to their husbands and fathers. It pained me, and Jack wanted me to do this? I couldn't leave him, not now, not ever. I turned towards him.

"I'm not going without you." I grabbed onto his shirt.

"You have to. Go, now!" he said trying to push me towards safety.

"No, Jack," I replied trying to hold my ground.

"Get in the boat Rose," he said trying to escort me again.

"No, Jack," I said firmly standing still.

"Yes! Get on the boat!" I didn't know if he was mad or upset with me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Cal walk up.

"Yes, get on the boat Rose," he said. Jack and I looked at him. He noticed my shivering complexion and blanket wrapped around me. "Oh my God, look at you. You look a fright! Here." He took off the blanket and wrapped his coat around me. I have to admit it was warmer than the blanket. Cal then started smoothing my hair away from my face and caressing it.

I pulled away and Jack pulled my over to the side and looked me in the eyes. "Go on, I'll get the next one."

My chin started trembling. "No. Not without you!" I said through clenched teeth.

"Look, I'll be alright. Listen, I'll be fine. I'm a survivor, alright? Don't worry about me. Now go on, get on!" Jack said. Tears formed in my eyes and I desperately tried to hold on to him.

Cal came back up to us. "I have an arrangement with an officer on the other side of the ship. Jack and I can get off safely." We both looked at him. To see if he was telling the truth. "Both of us," he finished up.

I looked at Jack who thought it over. He then looked at me. "See, I've got my own boat to catch." I just looked at him, this was the end.

"Hurry," Cal said. "They're almost full." The next thing I knew an officer grabbed my hand and pulled me on the lifeboat.

"Step aboard miss," he said to me. I turned and grabbed Jack's outstretched hand. An officer pushed him back and I was made to sit down. As soon as I sat down we started lowering into the murky cold water. The boat shook furiously, all I could think was _'what am I doing on here?'_

…

Jack and Cal watched on from the top deck. "You're a good liar," Cal shot in Jack's direction.

"Almost as good as you," Jack replied back. He then looked at Cal and then back at Rose. "There's uh, there's no arrangement is there?"

Cal looked up at him. "Oh, there is. Not that you'll benefit much from it." Jack looked at him knowing he wouldn't see Rose again. "I always win Jack. One way or another."

Jack looked down and then turned his head back to Rose, knowing this would be the last time he ever saw her. He wanted to take it all in.

…

I sat there with a thousand thoughts rushing through my mind. I was scared, confused, heartbroken, and felt sick to my stomach. The only comforting thing I could do was to distract myself. I looked at the officer, the people in my boat. The ropes as they lowered us to a way to find a safe haven.

I then did the unthinkable, I looked at Jack. He was staring back at me, I could see the tears in his eyes as he watched me go away from his life. The tears formed around my eyes again and I could barely breathe. My whole attention was focused on him.

A light flare was shot behind him illuminating his face full of compassion. The showers of light fell behind him and that's when I realized it. I loved him. I had to get off the boat! I looked for a place and lunged. I stood and walked forward.

"Rose!" I heard Jack yell. I jumped onto A deck and someone helped me over so I wouldn't fall to watery grave.

"Rose!" Jack yelled again.

"Stop her!" Cal yelled down to the people who helped me over.

"No!" Jack yelled. I raced for my life towards Jack. I pushed pass people not caring if I was rude or not. I just had to get to Jack.

I raced into the main hall where the grand staircase was. Jack ran in and I rushed up to him in a mess. I cried in happiness once I hit his arms.

"Rose!" Jack said as soon as I hit his arms. He hugged me as I cried. "You're so stupid! Why'd you do that huh? You're so stupid! Why'd you do that? Why?" he asked between kisses.

"You jump, I jump right?" I asked. He smiled.

"Right," he said softly. He pulled me into his embrace once more. We were safe for now at least. I knew nothing could separate me and Jack right now.

…

So what you all think? Did you like it? Review please! It would mean a lot to me!

Bloomy Angel


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